Saturday, July 17, 2010

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Herding worms with the nose

-52,457... 125,910... 1,516,071... Hey, Negrita take your snout out of the bin! You're scaring the babies!
-What babies, 99? I was just wondering why the dirt was moving inside the bin... could it possibly be a mini earthquake in there?

-No, Negrita. Where did you hear about mini earthquakes?! You're messing around with the wormies. Please don't... they're very sensitive...

-You mean you're breading baby dirt, 99?
-No, I'm raising worms. They're easily frightened, please be careful Negrita... Imagine two giant nostrils coming from nowhere and breathing all over you...

-Sorry... I don't see them... are they red? You know I have some problems with the red stuff...
-Yeah, I suppose they're reddish. Let me go on with the count. I told the cow and I went on
-1,516,072... 1,656,653...
-Mooo! Mooo! I can see them! I can see them! They're beautiful and what a mess they're doing!, she was so excited, how do you herd them, 99?

-I'm not sure. I'm just a beginner at this kind of farming.
-I see they're very friendly they're all hugging each other... 99 wait! can you read that? there they're writing hello to me!...
-Nah, that's not possible. They're just posing for the count...

-So you farm them? you don't ranch them? what do they eat? where did they learn to write? where's their school?
-Stop Negrita! I lost the count. I'll have to begin all over again now. I'll answer everything I know to you later but now you have to promise me that you'll keep quiet; I read it's very important to count them right
-Sorry, sorry, 99

-I'll farm them to collect their poo. They eat your poo. There's no worms school around here as far as I know and these ones came from California so they might have learn a couple of things on the plane. No way they can write or tell you anything. At least until they become comfortable in their new surroundings and then we'll see. You're being too anxious to communicate with immigrants, I told the cow while holding her from the neck with one hand and putting my glasses on with the other

-Bull-shit, 99. You know nothing, 99. They're so polite! Look, now they're greeting you, 99

-I guess they like your nose herding techniques, said the cow who was already preparing a big welcome cake manure
-... mmm... I guess so... well, welcome to the ranch little fellows... Now, please everybody stay still so I can count all of youse

The cow told something to the worms that I couldn't really catch. They were all looking my way so I think it was about my notebook or my herd counter.
It must have been something really funny because I swear I read some tiny red giggles

Sunday, July 04, 2010

Tilín, tilín... tolón, tolón...

Tengo una vaca lechera, no es una vaca cualquiera,
me da leche merengada, ¡ay! que vaca tan salada,
Tilín, tilín... tolón, tolón...